OK CUPID DATE

My sister told me I need to update my online dating profiles. So I did. After my profile was on silent for a year it was resurrected to "put myself out there." I'm now updated on ldssingles and okcupid.com. On Wednesday I went on a date with a 25 year old software developer that likes to cycle. He was pleasant, good conversation, and had good social cues. I didn't feel pressure, it was just two nice people in the neighborhood meeting up for a drink. I was happy to be keeping my chops sharp and at the end of the date I thought, I wouldn't mind seeing this guy again. Now that all the surface info is out there, here is what was actually going through my head. I've been watching The Bachelorette (don't judge), and on that show, Emily gets to ask all the tough questions right off the bat. Time is precious on that show so they have to move it all forward faster than you normally would. But I ask, why can't I do that too? I know there should be mystery and nuances and all that, and I think you still can even when you lay it all out on the table. But asking all hard questions at least finds out if you are on the same page. I don't want to scare a dude off by talking about babies and stuff, but at the same time, I don't want to be with someone who IS scared off by that. I just wanted to cut to the chase. I have a hard time just having a nice time, small talk conversation. Let's get real! Who's with me?!